Tim Tebow would make Lions fans and city of Detroit less miserable
It's quite possible that the Detroit Lions' 4-12, joke-of-a-season in 2012 contributed, at least in some way, to the city's No. 1 ranking on Forbes' most miserable list.
After posting a 10-6 record in 2011, the Lions' nosedive hit fans in the Motor City with a swift, back-to-reality punch in the gut -- the team Lions fans thought was on the upswing seemingly settled back into its rightful place among the NFL's mediocre franchises.
How can the Lions turn things around and make their fans jubilant?
The answer is simple: Acquire Tim Tebow.
The bible champion could be on the market very soon, as his current team, the New York Jets, is looking to off him to any willing taker.
Tebow would be perfect for the miserable sprawl known as Detroit. His angelic ways would ease those at Ford Field. Instead of grieving over a loss after leading by, let's say, about 14 points or so, fans would seek out Tebow's wisdom and guidance, asking the second coming for comfort and good tidings.
With a brisk touch on their forehead, Lions fans would instantly feel rejuvenated, ready to conquer the evils that plague their once-fair city.
Forget about football. Tebow would inspire an entire population -- an entire fanbase -- to shake their worldly habits and enter the bowel of the Motor City with benevolent intent to help those less fortunate.
The down-and-out Detroit residents would rejoice, crowning Tebow their king -- even if only for the football season. Tebow would walk among them wearing flip-flops and sporting a righteous patch of Jesus-like facial hair, handing out loaves of bread and recyclable bottles of holy water.
Detroit is miserable. Bring on The Tebow. He could turn things around via miracle after miracle.
Gliding along the Detroit River, Tebow would restore some sort of peace in the post-industrial melee that's been riddled with crime and ungodly acts of selfishness by its residents.
Jets coach Rex Ryan didn't allow Tebow to work his magic in the greater New York Area, but Lions coach Jim Schwartz would probably be on board, supporting the idea of pushing Matt Stafford aside so that the Lions' newly-minted Messiah could please his adoring pupils.
Flint, the No. 2-ranked most miserable city in America, is just an hour away. Tebow's spiritual message could easily flow its way up Interstate-75, touching the poor souls in the armpit of Michigan in the same manner that it inspired those in Detroit.
Hey, it could work.
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